My journey is far

In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

The following is an English translation of the work (not a formal/published work though) of Ali bin Hasan bin Ali - Zainal Abedin (the grandson of Ali radiAllahu anhu) . All errors are mine.

My journey is far and my provision isn't enough
And my strength has weakened
And death has impaired of me
And I have many many dhunnob left
Some of which i have commited in public
and some of which i have commited in private.
Only Allah (swt) knows!
How forbearing and kind Allah has been to be
Because He has given me respite
While I enduringly sinned and
He continues to cover me.
The hours of my days passed ...
without remorse, without tears, without fear and without grief.

I who close the doors behind the disobedience of Allah,
while the eyes of Allah watching me.
Leave me to mourn my nafs and to shed tears for it.
And let me pass the rest of the time in remembrance of death, in grief.
Let me shed tears of lamentation, uninteruptedly by per chance One might liberate me.

I imagine myself lying down in bed between my family members.
Their hands over me and i imagine around me those who cry for me;
those who mourn me and those who grief me.
They called for a doctor to help me
But the doctor will not be able to help me.

Pain extenuated when death began to pull my soul from every nerve with no gentleness, without respite.
Making the sound of gargle and my saliva inside became bitter in that.
And then they all left, and left me alone and decided to buy shrouds for me.
And the one most beloved to me shoot hastening the washer to come.
And a man from amongst them came - removed my clothes from me, left me naked and left me alone.
They laid me on the boards and the flow of water began to pour from over me - cleansing me.
And he poured water over me and washed me three times.
And called to bring kafan and they made me wear clothes without sleeves.
And my only provision became perfume and they took me out of this world.
Oh! How distressful it is for a journey without enough provision!
And they laid me on the shoulders of four men and behind me those who mourn me.
And they laid me in front of a pulpit and moved back behind the imam - who prayed and said salaam.
And they said salaah for me without ruku, without sujud - may be Allah would have mercy on me.

They lowered me inside of my grave and elected one of them to lay me in my lahab and he removed the clothe to look into my face and see me one last time.
He let a flood of tears and drowned me - let me in the darkness of the grave with no mother, no gentle father, and with no brother to console me.
What shall I tell Him?
The Munkar and Nakeer have concerned and terrified me?
O my hope Ya Allah!
Grace me with pardon and forgiveness from You.
I'm chained with my own sins!

My family members after they left divided among themselves my possessions
Yet my burden remains on my back weighing against me.
Therefore, let not dunya and its adornments distract you.
Look at what it has done to the people.
See the one who possesses all of dunya - what has he taken with him?

Therefore, take contentment and be pleased with it
even if the only thing you have had of it is repose and rest.
Oh my nafs! See from this disobedience and earn beautiful deeds.
So, Allah may have mercy on me.
Ya nafs! Woe unto you, repent and do a beautiful deed.
Hopefully you will be rewarded beautifully.
Verily the stranger is not the one who comes from the land of Sham and Yemen
But a stranger is one in ladhi and kafan...

---------- from a session with Shaykh Mokhtar.